Love of Agape

Among Paul’s epistles, the one to the Romans is considered as the summary of the whole New Testament; hence, that of Christianity itself. It is also said that all 150 chapters of the book of the Psalms are considered as a poetic outline of the whole Bible. If you are interested in the Christian minimalist approach, then, together with four Gospels, you must understand these two books by heart. If you are a regular Bible reader, then, after the epistle to the Romans, the next book you face is the first epistle to the Corinthians.

In this Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians, one of the well-known parts is the chapter 13, dubbed as the Chapter of Love, though in the King James Version (KJV), “love” is translated as “charity”. If you check with Strong’s Number, this is identified as G26, which means “agape“ in Greek.

In Greek, there are three kinds of “love”, eros, philia, and agape (strictly speaking there is the fourth love, storge, love between parents and children). Put them simply, eros is the desire to possess something outside of you; a kind of selfish possessive feeling. Philia is the desire to indulge yourself with it; a kind of friendly companionship. Agape is self-sacrifice, a kind of selfless care to others, also considered as the love of God.

While all of them are necessary for the healthy development of personality and character, there is still a “hierarchy” among them — from eros to philia to agape as lower to higher or shallower to deeper. But, this does not mean that the highest and deepest is absolutely a “single best.” The other two (or three, including storge) should not be harmful at all as long as these are executed soundly. In excess of any single “love” would be harmful, rather.

The way you love Jesus Christ should be, as Jesus himself expects, the love of agape. In the last chapter of the Gospel of John, you can easily recall the dialogue between Peter and Jesus:

“15 So when they had dined, Jesus saith to Simon Peter, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me more than these? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my lambs. 16 He saith to him again the second time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my sheep. 17 He saith unto him the third time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me?”

Peter was grieved because he said unto him the third time, Lovest thou me? And he said unto him, Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee. Jesus saith unto him, Feed my sheep.

“18 Verily, verily, I say unto thee, When thou wast young, thou girdest thyself, and walkedst whither thou wouldest: but when thou shalt be old, thou shalt stretch forth thy hands, and another shall gird thee, and carry thee whither thou wouldest not. 19 This spake he, signifying by what death he should glorify God. And when he had spoken this, he saith unto him, Follow me. “ (John 21: 15 - 19) 

Christ’s Charge to Peterby Raphael, 1515

Jesus was repeatedly asking Peter if Peter loves Jesus. Every time when Peter answered Jesus saying “Of course I love you, Master” and in the third time even at the insisting tone he was saying, “Of course you should know I love you so much”:

“And he said unto him, Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee.” (John 21: 17)

Upon Peter’s reaction, it seems Jesus calmly added the following statement as if he would predict the future of Peter’s realization and fate:

“18 Verily, verily, I say unto thee, When thou wast young, thou girdest thyself, and walkedst whither thou wouldest: but when thou shalt be old, thou shalt stretch forth thy hands, and another shall gird thee, and carry thee whither thou wouldest not. 19 This spake he, signifying by what death he should glorify God. And when he had spoken this, he saith unto him, Follow me.” John 21: 18 - 19

The type of love Peter repeatedly answered three times are all the love of philia. If you check Strong’s Number for this part, it is identified all G5363; it is phileo (the verb form of philia).

Even at this dramatic moment (even after the resurrection of Christ and the bitter, regrettable realization of Peter’s denial of Jesus three times due to his fear and weakness), Peter was still at the stage of philia in terms of how he loved Jesus. However, as Jesus calmly stated right after Peter’s answer, Jesus Christ knew that Peter will soon love him at the stage of apape, not because of his will power (which is baseless and always weak as ours are so), but because of the undeserved grace of our Father God, and Lord Jesus Christ.

Thus, Paul knew that the love of agape was the key for anyone’s Christian faith. In the first chapter of 1 Corinthians, every time when we read, we notice a sort of annoying fact that even the people of early Christian churches had already faced the conflicts and divisions among themselves.

“11 For it hath been declared unto me of you, my brethren, by them which are of the house of Chloe, that there are contentions among you. 12 Now this I say, that every one of you saith, I am of Paul; and I of Apollos; and I of Cephas; and I of Christ. 13 Is Christ divided? was Paul crucified for you? or were ye baptized in the name of Paul?” (1 Corinthians 1: 11 - 13)

1 Corinthians 1:1–2a from the 14th-century Minuscule 223

Why is this kind of conflicts and divisions always happening everywhere as long as people are involved? The one thing Paul is pointed out is our tendency to depend on worldly knowledge.

We, humans, are always comparing ourselves with others, saying “Are we smarter than them?”, “Is our Christian faith better and more divine than theirs?”, “Is our church truly legitimate, while theirs are not? “, “Are we going to be saved, but they are not?” and so on, so forth. You can hear this kind of conversations, opinions, and arguments in the midst of all Christians. Indeed, we can see the history of Christianity is full of these conflicts; some were so cruel and bloody even in this present time. This had been jump-started from the days of Paul’s letters.

When we are with such “comparing mode”, we tend to rely on our own knowledge; thus, any kind of worldly authorities would occupy our mind. The truth, however, is that the core of Christian faith is actually challenging this mindset — the part of our sinfulness. In the same chapter Paul says as follows:

“19 For it is written, I will destroy the wisdom of the wise, and will bring to nothing the understanding of the prudent. 20 Where is the wise? where is the scribe? where is the disputer of this world? hath not God made foolish the wisdom of this world? 21 For after that in the wisdom of God the world by wisdom knew not God, it pleased God by the foolishness of preaching to save them that believe. 22 For the Jews require a sign, and the Greeks seek after wisdom: 23 But we preach Christ crucified, unto the Jews a stumblingblock, and unto the Greeks foolishness; 24 But unto them which are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God, and the wisdom of God. 25 Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men; and the weakness of God is stronger than men. 26 For ye see your calling, brethren, how that not many wise men after the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called: 27 But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; 28 And base things of the world, and things which are despised, hath God chosen, yea, and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are: 29 That no flesh should glory in his presence. 30 But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption: 31 That, according as it is written, He that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord.” (1 Corinthians 1: 19 - 31) 

Citing Isaiah 29:14, Paul was clearly saying that the gospel he preaches was aiming to “destroy” the wisdom of the world. This way, nobody can be proud of themselves and any authoritative attributes, while people (represented Jews and Greeks in his writing) always want to see the sign (for Jews) and the wisdom (for Greeks) to prove such authorities. But then, to destroy such false expectations, Jesus interacted with those people who were far from such attributes as you can see various depictions throughout all four Gospels.

In this regard, Timothy Keller is also sharing his insights on Nicodemus and a Samaritan woman in his book, Encounters with Jesus.

“There is Nicodemus, flush with his moral and spiritual accomplishments, and there is someone out on the street who is homeless and addicted, and as far as God is concerned they are equally lost. They both need eternal spiritual life or something will eat them alive. And that life is going to have to be a free gift… 

So you see, Nicodemus and the Samaritan woman are equally sinners in need of grace. And so are we all. In every case, you are trying to be your own savior and lord, trying to put God in your debt, or at least trying to tilt the odds of the universe in your favor. Either way, Jesus calls it sin. He says that you need living water and that you need be born again to get it. You need to repent, admit your need, ask God to receive you for Jesus’ sake, and be converted.“

Nicodemus talking to Jesus by Henry Ossawa Tanner

Unknown women are always the key figures in the Gospel stories. This fact signifies such uniqueness of Christianity. If ever Christianity had a “worldly” ambition, all those castings should have been more “authoritative”. The smart, intelligent, strong, authoritative people would have been the key characters to depict the Christian stories and truthfulness.

Jesus and the Samaritan Woman at the Wellby Guercino

The fact is, however, the stories are based on the weak, fearful, even selfish people who eventually turned to the “saints” not because of their strong will-powers, efforts, practices, and rituals, etc, but because of the free gift of undeserved grace from our Father and Lord Jesus Christ. Also Keller says as follows in the same book:

“And yet, why do you think Jesus Christ came into this world through a pregnant unwed teenage girl in a patriarchal shame-and-honor culture? God didn’t have to do it that way. But I think it was his way of saying, “I don’t do things the way the world expects, but in the opposite way altogether. My power is made perfect in weakness. My Savior-Prince will be born not into a cradle in a royal palace but into a feed through in a stable – not to powerful and famous people but to disgraced peasants. And that is all part of the pattern. For Jesus will win salvation through weakness, suffering, and death on the cross. He will achieve power and influence through sacrificial service. And if you have Jesus in your life, you will taste much of the same treatment. But my salvation works like this – suffering leads to glory and death to resurrection. So have no fear. Receive Jesus Christ into your life, and I will be your honor. It doesn’t matter what the world thinks. “

Both eros and philia require a set of self-generated efforts. Due to your strong will-power, you can get what you want to get. Due to your effort, you can be friendly with whom you want to be friendly. To love (agape) someone, however, you have to deny yourself first. If you think you “can” love (agape) this person with your own heroic effort because this person isdeserved to be loved by you, then this is NOT agape anymore.

You love (agape) this person despite the “worldly facts” that you should not and cannot love this person. That is to say, you love this person because of the “godly fact”. For, you know that Jesus Christ loved you in the same way. That is agape. Even if you can love someone you want to love, which is just in the level of eros and philia. As Jesus himself was also saying:

“46 For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same? 47 And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so?” (Matthew 5: 46 – 47)

Perhaps when Jesus asked Peter three times, Peter’s love for Jesus Christ was still at the philia level. For, Peter believed that this time (while he denied three times before) he “can” finally love Jesus with his strong will-power. But then, Jesus immediately and clearly implied that this was not possible. Peter (and we all) really have to transform himself (and ourselves) to leap to this level of agape —not with his own (and our own) efforts but the free gift of the underserved grace.

“18 Verily, verily, I say unto thee, When thou wast young, thou girdest thyself, and walkedst whither thou wouldest: but when thou shalt be old, thou shalt stretch forth thy hands, and another shall gird thee, and carry thee whither thou wouldest not. 19 This spake he, signifying by what death he should glorify God. And when he had spoken this, he saith unto him, Follow me.” (John 21: 18 - 19)

This statement of Jesus, I believe, symbolizes the leap from philia to agape. In the Contemporary English Version (CEV) it says as follows:

“18 I tell you for certain that when you were a young man, you dressed yourself and went wherever you wanted to go. But when you are old, you will hold out your hands. Then others will wrap your belt around you and lead you where you don’t want to go.” 19 Jesus said this to tell how Peter would die and bring honor to God. Then he said to Peter, ‘Follow me!’” (John 21: 18 - 19)

And I also believe that this statement is in parallel with what Paul wrote on the following portion of the love chapter in 1 Corinthians:

“11 When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.12 For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.13 And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.” (1 Corinthian 13: 11 – 13)

Lastly, let’s read the most famous part of this chapter in both KJV and CEV.

KJV:

4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; 6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; 7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

CEV:

4 Love is kind and patient,

never jealous, boastful,

 proud, or 5 rude.

Love isn’t selfish

 or quick tempered.

It doesn’t keep a record

 of wrongs that others do.

6 Love rejoices in the truth,

 but not in evil.

7 Love is always supportive,

loyal, hopeful,

 and trusting.

8 Love never fails!

Are we kind and patient? Are we never jealous, boastful, proud, or rude? Are we not selfish or quick tempered? Don’t we keep a record of wrongs that others do? Using this part of the chapter 13 of 1 Corinthians, questioning ourselves could be a good way to realize how much we are still far from this kind of love, agape. Our love is always consciously and unconsciously either eros or philia (or at most storge with your children) even if we falsely believe some would be at the level of agape.

This is why, the conflicts and divisions never cease among Christians, ever since until now.